I remember Jerry Seinfeld made this joke about public speaking being the number one fear among people. He was like, “So that means at a funeral, the average person would rather be the one in the casket than the one giving the eulogy?” And I was like “Yeah, that doesn’t make any sense at all!” Public speaking might be scary, but it's not a long term thing like death.
*Insert the Seinfeld theme to play me out*
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Don't get me wrong, I can see why it's scary when you are talking to a room full of people and this is what you see:
I’ve just never had a problem with public speaking personally. Actually, I think it’s like my special skill. I don’t mean when I’m having a conversation or joking around with a couple of friends (I’m very nervous then). I’m talking about giving a presentation/speech to a large group of people. You know, when you actually plan out what you’re going to say and everyone is there just to “listen” to you?
I guess I just don’t care whether I make a fool of myself in front of other people. Most of them probably don’t even know who I am, or care for that matter. Not everyone is going to be paying attention, so don’t worry if you slip up one of your words. Only a few people saw that.
If you do want to make a big impression on your audience, don’t be afraid to be ambitious. Try something new and different out with what you are saying. Imagine you are presenting this to yourself. Don’t worry about the reactions on the audience’s faces. Unless it’s your boss or someone grading your presentation, it’s not important. Put all of your confidence into that time slot of presenting. And thank you for coming to my mini TED Talk!
My special skill in public speaking probably stems from elementary school. I had to present a lot of projects to large groups of people. Early on it was a lot of small topics. I remember in first grade I had to present a poster board that explained why Christmas is my favorite holiday. Unless you were really interested in my love for Christmas, there wasn’t much to hear from that.
As I rose through the ranks (in other words, went from grade to grade), my presentations were on more informative and interesting topics. But through all of this, I gained a lot of presentation skills from presenting all these projects over and over again. We did a lot of display fairs where kids from other classes (and occasionally parents) would come and view the projects they thought were interesting. So in about half an hour, we would typically have to present the same projects 5-6 times.
I don’t know if other elementary schools did this (most likely), but having to publicly speak about my projects over and over again numbed me to the whole concept. It’s like I found public speaking’s kryptonite, the weakness of the beast, the broccoli of the child. I feel like I am able to give a public presentation on anything (ya know, if I am prepared for it).
There are still some habits I have when speaking publicly that I should work on. I like to use a lot of motion when I talk, which can sometimes get a little distracting. I’ll fiddle with my hands, shuffle around in my feet, giving off bad body language.
In the last couple of years, I’ve had to do a lot of public presentations and speeches. Probably the biggest one I have had to give thus far was for my graduation ceremony. I was the salutatorian of my high school class. Yes I know, please hold your applause till the end.
Not too many people know this, unless you went to high school with me of course. I don’t go around bragging about it (well, except for that one day). I’ll mention it every once in a while, but not in an “in your face” kind of way. It’s just a trophy after all:
Ooooo, shiny!
In addition to the trophy, I was given the honor of presenting a speech at graduation. Which in my opinion is a much better prize. There I am, standing in front of my 299 fellow students and all of their families and amigos, with a microphone at my hand. What they hear is dictated by me. I have the power, so much power!
I kinda knew for a while there was a chance I would be giving some sort of speech. And yet, I had absolutely nothing prepared when they made it official. I remember there were times when I woke up in the middle of the night and wrote down some ideas of what I should say. I consulted those notes, only to realize none of it really made any sense. Needless to say, late night Matthew has a lot of weird stuff going on in his head.
I couldn’t use any of those notes, no way. I had to write the speech from scratch. I started thinking about all the moments from my four years of high school that I could use. Man I goofed off a lot. But I also thought about all of the people I made those memories with and how much they meant to me. I could have given a whole speech about my experience, but I wanted to give everyone else a chance to say something.
I put something out there on social media for people to contribute their favorite memories into my speech. I got a pretty fair amount of suggestions, from the senior trip to fart pranks to burnt tater tots (A lot of weird stuff happened at my school). Don’t worry, I made sure people were okay with having their names in the speech and anonymized the ones that weren’t. I thought this was a much better speech than making it just about me.
Me and the Valedictorian practiced the speech the day before graduation at the football stadium. It was weird giving my speech to a bunch of empty seats. Hmm, they must not have liked it and went home. Well, if you can’t beat them join them.
The day finally came where I was to graduate from high school. My parents were busy getting ready, so I carpooled with my best friend and his mom. We made sure to wear all of our medals and stolls to show off all our high school accomplishments. Well, I guess I just did that. He wouldn’t be able to breath if he had all those medals hanging down his neck.
When we got to the school, we were led into the indoor gymnasium. All of our friends were there, dressed up in graduation gowns, celebrating the night to come. We took a bunch of photos with each other and jammed to the music that was blasting. I had to pause all of that for a minute and prepare myself in the bathroom. I had a moment of realization where I was like, “Oh this is really happening, I’m going to go up on a stage and talk in front of thousands of people. This is my life.”
The time finally came for us all to graduate. I was really nervous, like I was going to barf before I even made it to the stage. I took a couple of seconds to calm myself down before we sat down. They did the whole walk with “Pomp and Circumstance” playing over the speakers while we sat down in our seats. The principal came up to say a few words, then the superintendent, then the teacher that was going to introduce me. Wait, what now?
I did not expect to give my speech so soon. Before I even knew it, he finished his introduction and I was walking up to the stage. This was it, the big moment. Just had to keep my confidence for five whole minutes.
And you know what, I did it. I spoke to a stadium filled with people, earning more laughs than I thought I would get. It wasn’t the best speech ever, but it still felt incredible. I got to receive a trophy and hug from my favorite high school teacher, then walk off into the sunset. Cause that’s what all the cool guys do.
Giving that speech was probably one of the coolest experiences in my life. It was scary giving a public speech to a bunch of people sure, but the way I captivated my audience and made people feel was an empowering sensation. My family and friends loved it. Quotes from my speech were plastered all around my house until I left for college.
I’m not expecting anyone to read this and get over any fears they may have of public speaking (and if you did, my fee for the help is $25). But I did want to share what it felt like when you put your fears aside and let the world hear you.
Until the next speech, stay Mattastic!
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